Choices

I watched in horror as a panel of women discussed whether having a purpose in life was positive or negative. One of the ladies was reading a recent social media post that said having a purpose was stressful, and, just like finding a soul-mate, having a life purpose was a fairy tale that didn’t exist. (Laughter all around.)

After I calmed down a bit, I tuned back into the segment. One of the ladies was relating a story about a woman who had always wanted to be a nurse and help people, but life got in the way. She ended up doing something completely different.

The negatives to living one’s purpose, as they described it, were the constant drive to get ahead, be the best, and work really hard. “It’s patriarchal.” they said. I relaxed a little. They were describing what I would call running around the hamster wheel, the rat-race, or working a J.O.B. just to survive or get ahead. Our life's purpose is quite different.

I prefer to use the word "mission". Purpose is something one aspires to do and have. A soul-inspired mission grows and becomes part of us. We breathe our mission. A purpose is linear requiring a plan toward a goal. A mission envelopes our life. I experienced the difference after a life-time of chasing the dollar and wrote about the process of transformation to meaningful life in my first book due to be published this year. We all want that deep recognition of knowing who we are and what fulfills us.

The panel discussion is one of the most compelling reasons I wrote my first book and will undertake writing two more, all on finding and living one’s soul-led mission. Our mission could be anything: a mom with four children, a teacher, Prime Minister of Canada, a farmer, a person one encounters whose authenticity changes people around them. The point of a mission is to make a difference and inspire those around them to make a difference. How one chooses to make a difference is one's purpose.

If one is constantly driven to get ahead, be the best, and work really hard for no other reason that to get ahead, be the best, and work really hard, what is the end result? I found out it was burn-out, stress, illness, disillusionment, depression, substance abuse, and much more. Money certainly was a driving force. So was my soul. Struggling to find one's purpose or mission is stressful and frustrating, but moving away from one's mission in life can cause stress and illness. That kind of stress contributed greatly to my bouts of illnesses and auto-immune diseases. Finally finding my life's purpose was a relief and set off a flurry of creative activity that hasn't stopped. A purpose driven by money will inevitably not end well, no matter how many things you have, your status, or your perceived power. A soul-led purpose will always be powerful enough to benefit ourselves, the people around us, our planet, and the world.

My life was a struggle to find my own unique purpose. I ended up hiding myself so well, I lost who I was inside. A fractured me then went through life trying out different vocations in an attempt to find out who I was again. I discovered my jobs were not who I was. I wanted desperately to do something so meaningful to me that it lit up my insides, woke up my passion, and fueled my growth for a lifetime. That's the difference. Although I could do a lot of jobs well, I didn't achieve worldly success in terms of money, prestige, power, and status. I did, however, find myself and began to feel extraordinarily powerful and wealthy in a completely different way.

Living one’s mission is also a passage toward adulthood. Adulthood, here, isn’t measured by chronological age. When I reconnected with my soul, I began walking the path of being my authentic self. My soul urged me toward self-care and self-love, too, until they erupted into a self-less love that took up residence in every cell in my body. Finally, in the stillness of a moment, my soul whispered the words that fulfilled the emptiness inside me, and with joy, I recognized they were exactly who I was. It propelled me forward to create something to offer the world, no matter how big or small that something was. It was my joy, motivator, fulfillment, and my rite of passage into true adulthood.

Self-care is mandatory. When I take my annual break from social media mid-December to mid-February, I am doing important work like going deep into my purpose to get more specific about the messages I write to those who choose to read my posts. What does that look like? I meditate, do healing work, walk in nature, and spend large chunks of time listening to my soul, guides, ancestors and trees. I focus on the changes I need to make to mature and grow. From that space, I can create and offer my thoughts to others.

During this time, I received a word that embodied what this year might be about. The word came to me loudly: CHOICES, in all capital letters. What followed was massive inspiration about all the choices I could make this year. After all the thoughts and ideas, I was left with one thought. In who I am and what I do, I choose to stand with grace, and welcome the power that comes from within.

I wish I could have been part of the discussion panel with those women. I could have asked them, if finding a soul-mate and having a life purpose were fairy tales that didn’t exist, what are we existing for? I submit we exist to find and choose our life's purpose, but somehow always forget that the place to start looking for it is always within ourselves.