Compelled to Shift

Created by the Author - 2006. Quote is from The Question, by Percy Bysshe Shelley.

Reading a book when writing a book is sometimes too much. At this stage of my manuscript, I’m editing for relevance, readability, and flow, but lately, I’ve been pining to start on the growing list of books I want to read when I can. Paul Coelho’s book, The Alchemist, was on my list. As I began reading the book, I became fascinated by the concept of what happens when we make life decisions.

 “When someone makes a decision, he is really diving into a strong current that will carry him to places he had never dreamed of when he first made the decision.” 

Paul Coelho, The Alchemist, (New York: 2014), p. 70. Kindle.

https://www.goodreads.com/book/show/18144590-the-alchemist

As I read, I revisited the decisive moments in my life when it seemed like I was diving into a strong current. One of those decisions was to work with an amazing interior design mentor for a few years. The decision felt momentous. I loved her creativity and expertise, and she helped to evolve my design sense, essential to staging clients’ homes for sale. 

During this time, I collected and read design magazines, stacks of them. One can only keep so many magazines, so I decided to look through all of them and cut out favourite articles, pictures, and graphics. The photo above is the first montage I made in 2006. Over a couple of years, I’d made six of them. This one is called MINDSIGHT. 

Compelled to shift. An exuberant figure dances in the courtyard—the artist begins... 

I shall be telling this with a sigh

somewhere ages and ages hence:

Two roads diverged in a wood, and I,

I took the one less travelled by,

and that has made all the difference.

Robert Frost, The Road not Taken

It was impossible for me to predict that two decades later, I took the road less travelled and felt compelled to shift into that strong flowing current again. 

The year 2018 might have well been eons ago. I’d left my job in interior design for real estate in 2008 and was serving a growing clientele. In 2018, I wanted to find a new way to respond to my clients in a deeper way. This meant more time getting sellers’ homes ready for sale, and more time with buyers narrowing down wants, needs, and must-have deal breakers. It also meant I had to listen with intuition, not just ears. 

My intuition was spot on when I listened to it. On a whim, I asked a real estate client couple I knew who were reiki masters if reiki would help with real estate. Despite the uninformed question, one of them immediately said yes, while the other chuckled. I probed a little deeper, asking how it would help me. The woman paused, then said, “It will change you.” I signed up and made appointments for a few reiki sessions before I started the first class so I could experience it. I felt compelled to shift and dive, once again, into the strong current. 

Throughout many experiences, there was a “mysterious chain,” as Paul writes, “that links one thing to another”. I’d received a Reiki Master Level One and had completed many ThetaHealing classes toward becoming a ThetaHealing practitioner. Still, I couldn’t decide what to do with my training and was struggling to stand in the strong current propelling me forward to places I’d never dreamed of. 

In fact, I felt like I made one step forward and two steps back, yet I still felt compelled to shift. I learned that a “Personal Legend,” or our true reason for existence, lives within each of us, but mine remained elusive. How I wrestled, shouted, and stomped. I read, researched, took business classes, watched countless webinars, seminars, and attended Zoom calls to ferret out my destiny. That was a lot of doing, and not very much listening. 

Upon deeper introspection, I realized I couldn't force myself to pursue a vocation that didn't feel genuine and fulfilling to me. Instead, I needed to surrender to the current to carry me. Surrendering felt like I was giving up at first, but realized it was my ego that needed surrendering. In surrendering, intuition grew. As intuition grew, I became more aware of synchronicities. They were markers of light along the way and comforted me when I doubted the path I was travelling. 

Several healers helped as I muddled through layers of patterns that no longer served me to find the inner self I’d hidden in multiple locked boxes inside. Unlocking them brought healing, and with healing, I recognized the strong current carrying me forward and no longer felt compelled to shift. I WAS shifting and stopped standing, allowing the strong current to carry me forward. 

In August 2022, I began writing joyfully, eagerly, but being in the current doesn’t mean smooth sailing. I’ve agonized over how to write and who to write for, but today I acknowledge my calling as an author/healer/visionary. 

Originally conceived as a self-help guide, my writing has evolved into a more personal account of my journey towards finding my life's work, a journey I hope will resonate with and entertain my readers as they read along. However, they may find themselves directed inward to begin their search for personal legend, as Paul Coelho says. Today, I’m riding in a strong current of possibilities as I create and write. The person I was before has changed, replaced by someone who followed that "compellsion" to shift, surrendered to the strong current, and found their life's purpose.