A Social Day or a Social Media Day?

This is my shot of the raccoon in the tree mentioned below.

Not every day is a social day, but this day was. I realized as I walked that this time had become my social connection and conversation time. Not only that, the little time I spent scrolling through social media was not nearly as enjoyable as it once was. My point? I'd have to go back to a talk show guest from the University of Washington who had just given a brief talk on how social media today has become a source of stress. Not satisfied with the brief interview, I did a bit of research on Dr. Tommy Wood. Here's what I found.

Dr. Wood is a neuroscientist currently working as an Associate Professor at the Washington School of Medicine in Seattle as Director, Neonatal Neuroscience Lab, and Director of Preclinical Research, Division of Neonatology. His job description seemed a little disconnected from a discussion of How to Thrive in '25: How Social Media Affects Your Brain, the subject of his interview on Live with Kelly and Mark, which aired originally on January 7, 2005. Apparently, I saw a rerun of that episode yesterday. 1

To figure out how Dr. Wood made that leap from neonatology to social media and our brains, I also found his Better Brain podcast #65: Tommy's TV Adventure, and how is social media affecting our brain? 2 It all started because he's writing a book. Eureka! I knew I had a connection to the interview I had seen. Dr. Tommy is an affable young man who is really quite good at translating his knowledge and research into something I could easily understand, and he's going to be a first-time author, just like me.

Unlike me, he has a team of PR (public relations) experts who helped him get invited to the Live with Kelly and Mark Show. Long story short, he had five questions that would fit into the segment on the show. He wanted to talk about the evolution of the body and how it responds to social isolation, but the show limited him to four minutes. So he brought up the fact that when social media started, it was used to improve social connection with family and friends who lived elsewhere. He makes the point that even though social media is not like that anymore, we can still use it to improve our social connections online and in the real world instead of using it as a tool that subconsciously enhances isolation and loneliness.

The Kelly and Mark segment didn't go into the negative effects of social media, but the Better Brain Fitness podcast does, explaining how loneliness and isolation affect us. Briefly, being alone and lonely triggers a survival mechanism, which then shifts immune pathways and the sympathetic nervous system, resulting in our feeling "slightly more stressed and slightly more inflamed at baseline, which makes us more resilient to injury and you heal faster."3 That's a good thing, but there is a dark side to that survival mechanism when interacting with social media as it is today.

Bear with me here. I'm getting to why social media might be one cause of loneliness and isolation. I've certainly felt anxiety late at night when I occasionally scroll through social media.

It turns out we feel as much stress in certain social situations, like social media scrolling, as we do in isolation. When I think about it, I'm really comparing my self-worth, accomplishments, appearance, and social status to the people featured in front of me as I scroll. Unconsciously, I probably look at other authors' successes and feel I'm not as good as they are. In reality, there's no way to actually find out because I'm making an unconscious judgment about myself that may or may not be true.

It's enough to make your head spin! Now, let's go back to my walking routine and what I discovered. Certainly, I'm on the introvert side of the introvert/extrovert scale. Parties, bars, and going to the movies or the malls are not relaxing or fun social activities for me. I prefer reading a book or hanging out with a maximum of six people for my social needs. That's why my walk is wonderful for daily social contact. On this day, I ran into a friend I hadn't seen for months, followed by hugs, smiles, and a check-in before we continued our walks.

Further along, I saw a man hoist his camera and telephoto lens to take a sudden shot. The movement looked so natural to him; what a pleasure it was to see him take his shot. He showed me the raccoon sound asleep in the tree above us, and I took the picture featured in this post. Turns out he and his partner and dog were visiting from Williams Lake. Another lady joined us and told them about the multiple herons hanging out at the Royston Wrecks, which prompted me to recommend they visit the Royston Roasting Co. & Coffee House. Ooh, he said, my partner loves coffee.

The next person I interacted with was a familiar person, but on this day, it seemed to me she didn't look as healthy as she usually does. I asked if she was OK. She said yes but then paused and said she'd had an operation recently. She shared her experience and some details about the operation. Our chat left us both feeling uplifted.

Thinking about those interactions made me smile. I don't need social media; I just need to take a walk and interact with the people I see every day, noticing them in a way that encourages and leaves us all feeling seen and more content. I felt restored in humanity and in myself. Having completed my walk, I then watched the interview featuring Dr. Tommy Wood. Go figure, I discovered my social activity is the people I meet daily with no media, no FOMO, no comparing, and no issues of self-worth involved.

What do you think? Will today be a social day or a social media day? I had to end with a startling quote from Dr. Vivek H. Murthy, the 19th and 21st Surgeon General of the United States. He criss-crossed the U.S. on a listening tour to research public health care concerns. It's worth reading this letter in its entirety. 5

Loneliness is far more than just a bad feeling—it harms both individual and societal health. It is associated with a greater risk of cardiovascular disease, dementia, stroke, depression, anxiety, and premature death. The mortality impact of being socially disconnected is similar to that caused by smoking up to 15 cigarettes a day, and even greater than that associated with obesity and physical inactivity. And the harmful consequences of a society that lacks social connection can be felt in our schools, workplaces, and civic organizations, where performance, productivity, and engagement are diminished.

1. See Live with Kelly and Mark segment with Dr. Tommy Wood YouTube video.

2. Better Brain Fitness Podcast #65, Tommy's TV Adventure, and how is social media affecting our brain?

3. BBF Podcast #65, Location 13:34-14:03

4. Better Brain Fitness Podcast #37, Survival of the Kindest, Location 10:34-11:13

5. U.S. Surgeon General's letter in Our Epidemic of Loneliness and Isolation The U.S. Surgeon General’s Advisory on the Healing Effects of Social Connection and Community. See the document HERE.